I've been doing quite a bit of soul searching lately. A few years back, Mark and I were in a situation that God clearly called us out of. Mark was at peace with it quickly, and I struggled. I knew what I needed to do, and it was to move on. However, I don't like feeling insecure, and I was in a familiar, comfortable spot. My private walk with God wasn't growing much, and although that was my personal responsibility, I was remaining in circumstances that weren't encouraging growth. We did make our "move", and it's been blessed in many ways. Truly, looking back I am so thankful.
I'm currently in a Beth Moore Bible study, and if any of you have heard her speak, she has such a heart for God and really challenges her listeners to seek God. She has a rather painful past, and though my experiences were different, I can relate in many ways. I've become aware of my own fears and insecurities, and also that God is the only One who can fill certain needs I have. This morning in our study, I was challenged to look at who I am when it is just me and God. That time is the heart of my relationship with Him and matters so much.
I'm also thinking about my priorities, and I intend to limit my online time a bit more. Right now the baby is sleeping and the older two are at school, but I don't want them to remember me on the computer. With a difficult pregnancy and then bed rest, I was on here a lot, but now it's a new season. There's a lot good online, advice, information on all sorts of things, and of course Facebook! It's a pretty neat tool for keeping up with friends and family. I'm not saying goodbye, but I'm not going to try to read my whole feed anymore. Please know that if you need prayer, support, or encouragement, you can always send me a private message, and I will make sure I read those.
It's now time for me to get a few things done before my sweet baby wakes up.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
I said goodbye to a dear friend today...
Snuggles has been in my life for 17 years, even before Mark. She was such a sweet, unique kitty, and I loved her from the day I brought her home! Ha, I really don't know what my parents were thinking letting me keep her when I literally snuck her into our home and told them the next day! I was back living at home at that time, and they even took care of her for several months when I lived in a house where I couldn't bring her. She was one of my most faithful and true friends, and was such a comfort to me. In cat years, she was well over one hundred years old. Though I know she had a wonderful life with us, I was not ready to say goodbye. The past few days she has not seemed herself and had really been dropping weight. We took her to our vet, and found out she was not doing well at all. They ran a test for their own purposes and didn't charge us, but as they suspected, she had cancer...very invasive at that point.
So, ironically enough, we picked up the kids from their first day of Kindergarten and third grade to say goodbye. Ellie, Mark, and I are by far having the hardest time. The kids didn't know the details exactly, and won't until they are older. But they knew she was very sick and was not going to live. Ellie said she thought we were going to keep Snuggles, and I told her I knew wanted to too. It just about broke my heart saying goodbye to my sweet friend. I will always love and miss her.
Part of me can't believe I'm going though this. I just told my other kitty friend goodbye four months ago. Today I sent off my little girl to Kindergarten. I've been fighting some significant PPD. The timing simply sucks, but there was nothing I could do. Oh, and to top it off, I have a super busy week.
I felt so crushed and heartbroken. Yet in the pain and the hurt, I am blessed with for my family, and most of all the hope that is deep inside of me and at times masked by this depression. I could share that with my kids as we talked about Snuggles. Snuggles was a cat, and I don't know if somehow animals have an afterlife. I really like Ellie's thought that maybe God sends a beloved pet to the new earth that will one day be free of sin. I would really love to one day see her and her sidekick Fluffy.
It's because of sin that there is hurt and pain and that horrible word death. I so wish it was not true, but it is. When I was growing up, I would try to do things right and be good enough. Hey, even now, I struggle with trying too hard or being too hard on myself as a mom, wife, etc. When I was young, I had to let go and realize that it was all about Jesus being the perfect One, the only One who could make me good enough and free. There was absolutely nothing I could do but reach out and accept His gift. It totally goes against what our culture tells us, but there is only one way and only One who can offer us eternal life with Him. As I was taking a shower this afternoon, I was thinking about loss and death. I realized again what a gift it is to know that I don't have to fear death. I have hope even in the midst of pain.
I'm exhausted, my head hurts, and my heart hurts. I'm so very human. I so hope I can sleep long and well tonight. This is such a personal post that I hesitate a bit to share it. I needed to type this out, if nothing else for my own grieving process.
So, ironically enough, we picked up the kids from their first day of Kindergarten and third grade to say goodbye. Ellie, Mark, and I are by far having the hardest time. The kids didn't know the details exactly, and won't until they are older. But they knew she was very sick and was not going to live. Ellie said she thought we were going to keep Snuggles, and I told her I knew wanted to too. It just about broke my heart saying goodbye to my sweet friend. I will always love and miss her.
Part of me can't believe I'm going though this. I just told my other kitty friend goodbye four months ago. Today I sent off my little girl to Kindergarten. I've been fighting some significant PPD. The timing simply sucks, but there was nothing I could do. Oh, and to top it off, I have a super busy week.
I felt so crushed and heartbroken. Yet in the pain and the hurt, I am blessed with for my family, and most of all the hope that is deep inside of me and at times masked by this depression. I could share that with my kids as we talked about Snuggles. Snuggles was a cat, and I don't know if somehow animals have an afterlife. I really like Ellie's thought that maybe God sends a beloved pet to the new earth that will one day be free of sin. I would really love to one day see her and her sidekick Fluffy.
It's because of sin that there is hurt and pain and that horrible word death. I so wish it was not true, but it is. When I was growing up, I would try to do things right and be good enough. Hey, even now, I struggle with trying too hard or being too hard on myself as a mom, wife, etc. When I was young, I had to let go and realize that it was all about Jesus being the perfect One, the only One who could make me good enough and free. There was absolutely nothing I could do but reach out and accept His gift. It totally goes against what our culture tells us, but there is only one way and only One who can offer us eternal life with Him. As I was taking a shower this afternoon, I was thinking about loss and death. I realized again what a gift it is to know that I don't have to fear death. I have hope even in the midst of pain.
I'm exhausted, my head hurts, and my heart hurts. I'm so very human. I so hope I can sleep long and well tonight. This is such a personal post that I hesitate a bit to share it. I needed to type this out, if nothing else for my own grieving process.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Hanging in There
Or I'm trying to... I'm pretty sure I need to go in to get my medication changed or adjusted. I've had some pretty down in the dumps times lately. I've been crying more often, and sometimes feeling pretty discouraged. Today we were supposed to go have some fun family time together, either at a state park or the Farmer's Market, but we stayed home. Mark let me take a long nap.
I know God is looking out for me, but it's still hard to see the light at the end of this tunnel. Yes, even when I've seen how He can use this for me to touch other people hurting and going though the same thing.
My sweet Nathan is doing well, except he's totally living up to his nickname: "Zombie Baby." Mark calls him that now and then because, seriously, the kid does NOT like to nap during the day. I've probably goofed up by not sleep training and holding him so much. He's very sensitive to noise too. The weird thing is most of the time he really is happy and content. I'm hoping with the other two at school we'll be able to work on this a bit more. It is harder to get on a schedule or sleep train when he doesn't have his own room.
My other kids got good teachers for the fall, and I'm glad! It still feels so strange to think of Ellie going to school in the fall. She's totally ready, but I really will miss my little pal. On the other hand, it will be so much easier only having one child home during the day.
One other thing that's been heavy on my heart is this whole health care reform issue. I'm sure most of you know (or have figured out) I'm a fairly conservative Christian. You might also be more surprised to know I do believe some serious reform IS needed, but honestly, I am very concerned about the plans as they are. I grew up without health insurance and spent most of my early 20's without any. I've been there with medical bills I wasn't sure how I was going to pay. Even now with a fairly decent plan, we spend a lot on having our family covered very month. The cost of medical care is often truly insane; for example, we were sent to the ER when Ellie developed her second venous malformation. They did almost nothing other than weigh her, take her temp and blood pressure, and look at her arm. The total bill was about $1,700. Hm, must have been the crackers and juice they gave her when we were stuck there so long. Then we were told that unless she developed fever and chills that we could wait to see the surgeon. Ha, I could have done all that myself for no cost at all except getting a smaller cuff for my blood pressure unit! Medical costs and insurance have sky rocked, and there are so many people not getting care who need it. It's a messed up system. I do have some ideas floating around in my head of ways to improve it, but that's a post for another day. Please be gentle if you strongly disagree with me. I've been feeling rather fragile lately.
Right now I just keep trying to remember to pray and trust God. He does have the answers to our struggles and hurts.
I know God is looking out for me, but it's still hard to see the light at the end of this tunnel. Yes, even when I've seen how He can use this for me to touch other people hurting and going though the same thing.
My sweet Nathan is doing well, except he's totally living up to his nickname: "Zombie Baby." Mark calls him that now and then because, seriously, the kid does NOT like to nap during the day. I've probably goofed up by not sleep training and holding him so much. He's very sensitive to noise too. The weird thing is most of the time he really is happy and content. I'm hoping with the other two at school we'll be able to work on this a bit more. It is harder to get on a schedule or sleep train when he doesn't have his own room.
My other kids got good teachers for the fall, and I'm glad! It still feels so strange to think of Ellie going to school in the fall. She's totally ready, but I really will miss my little pal. On the other hand, it will be so much easier only having one child home during the day.
One other thing that's been heavy on my heart is this whole health care reform issue. I'm sure most of you know (or have figured out) I'm a fairly conservative Christian. You might also be more surprised to know I do believe some serious reform IS needed, but honestly, I am very concerned about the plans as they are. I grew up without health insurance and spent most of my early 20's without any. I've been there with medical bills I wasn't sure how I was going to pay. Even now with a fairly decent plan, we spend a lot on having our family covered very month. The cost of medical care is often truly insane; for example, we were sent to the ER when Ellie developed her second venous malformation. They did almost nothing other than weigh her, take her temp and blood pressure, and look at her arm. The total bill was about $1,700. Hm, must have been the crackers and juice they gave her when we were stuck there so long. Then we were told that unless she developed fever and chills that we could wait to see the surgeon. Ha, I could have done all that myself for no cost at all except getting a smaller cuff for my blood pressure unit! Medical costs and insurance have sky rocked, and there are so many people not getting care who need it. It's a messed up system. I do have some ideas floating around in my head of ways to improve it, but that's a post for another day. Please be gentle if you strongly disagree with me. I've been feeling rather fragile lately.
Right now I just keep trying to remember to pray and trust God. He does have the answers to our struggles and hurts.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Motivation
Why is it some days I seem to have so much motivation, and others I wish Nathan and I could just go curl up and take a nap? We actually did do that the other day. We had a busy and fun weekend up north at the in laws, and I was wiped. I love that my baby loves to snuggle and cuddle.
We went to swimming lessons this morning, and I'm trying to work up motivation to go clean upstairs but instead I'm sitting here on the computer. Nathan's happy now, so it's a good time to clean. I feel like many of the moms I know don't struggle the way I do to keep the house clean, and I wonder why that is. Am I doing something wrong? It's frustrating because I think I'm the only one in this house who really wants it clean. My kids don't naturally clean up after themselves and have to be reminded. Does anyone have any tips or advice for me? I've done a lot of decluttering, and it's still not there. Our home isn't huge...1500 square feet plus a finished basement and storage room. But people used to live (and many still do!) with far less than that.
Anyway, nothing is getting done while I sit here. Nathan still doesn't move very far (rolls and army crawls in circles), so he can hang out near me while I clean and declutter. Please feel free to comment. How do you keep up, or do you?
We went to swimming lessons this morning, and I'm trying to work up motivation to go clean upstairs but instead I'm sitting here on the computer. Nathan's happy now, so it's a good time to clean. I feel like many of the moms I know don't struggle the way I do to keep the house clean, and I wonder why that is. Am I doing something wrong? It's frustrating because I think I'm the only one in this house who really wants it clean. My kids don't naturally clean up after themselves and have to be reminded. Does anyone have any tips or advice for me? I've done a lot of decluttering, and it's still not there. Our home isn't huge...1500 square feet plus a finished basement and storage room. But people used to live (and many still do!) with far less than that.
Anyway, nothing is getting done while I sit here. Nathan still doesn't move very far (rolls and army crawls in circles), so he can hang out near me while I clean and declutter. Please feel free to comment. How do you keep up, or do you?
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Crockpot Spaghetti Sauce
I thought I'd share Wendy's famous spaghetti sauce recipe. It is SO good and is one of our family's favorite recipes.
6-15oz cans of tomato sauce
1-12oz can of tomato paste
1 medium onion, finely chopped
4 garlic cloves, finely chopped
1/4 cup of oregano (dried)
1/4 cup sweet basil (dried)
1 package hot Italian Sausage, crumbled
1 lb. ground beef
1/2 cup brown sugar (original recipe is 3/4 cup)
Brown ground beef and sausage in pan and drain. (You can brown the onion and garlic if you want.) Add all ingredients into crock pot on the low setting for 8-10 hours. Serve over pasta.
The sauce freezes very well.
6-15oz cans of tomato sauce
1-12oz can of tomato paste
1 medium onion, finely chopped
4 garlic cloves, finely chopped
1/4 cup of oregano (dried)
1/4 cup sweet basil (dried)
1 package hot Italian Sausage, crumbled
1 lb. ground beef
1/2 cup brown sugar (original recipe is 3/4 cup)
Brown ground beef and sausage in pan and drain. (You can brown the onion and garlic if you want.) Add all ingredients into crock pot on the low setting for 8-10 hours. Serve over pasta.
The sauce freezes very well.
It's August
And I'm hanging in there. I'm still not better, but some days are better than others. The kids absolutely loved swimming lessons this week, and it got me dressed and out of the house every day. We also checked out a very nice free splash park, and had a fun play date with friends.
I've started taking some higher quality vitamins, and they really help. I was reading a PPD blog about them, and how depleted our bodies are after pregnancy. The two days when I did not take them, I was significantly more tired and drained. They come in capsules, so I think they're easier to absorb. Unfortunately, they are expensive, but if they make a big difference, we'll budget them in.
Today I did some major cleaning in the basement, both the storage area and the family room. It really needed it. I got rid of a ton of stuff, and that made me feel good. I think I did a bit too much because I'm pretty wiped out now! But the majority of it is DONE. A friend who was moving gave me a love seat and a couch that are in decent shape that will go in the family room. It's going to be much more comfortable down there.
I'm also on a mission to be more frugal and budget better, but that's a post for another day.
I've started taking some higher quality vitamins, and they really help. I was reading a PPD blog about them, and how depleted our bodies are after pregnancy. The two days when I did not take them, I was significantly more tired and drained. They come in capsules, so I think they're easier to absorb. Unfortunately, they are expensive, but if they make a big difference, we'll budget them in.
Today I did some major cleaning in the basement, both the storage area and the family room. It really needed it. I got rid of a ton of stuff, and that made me feel good. I think I did a bit too much because I'm pretty wiped out now! But the majority of it is DONE. A friend who was moving gave me a love seat and a couch that are in decent shape that will go in the family room. It's going to be much more comfortable down there.
I'm also on a mission to be more frugal and budget better, but that's a post for another day.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
It will not beat me!
I talked with my therapist yesterday, and if I'm not feeling better by early next week, I'm going to get evaluated to see if the Zoloft needs to be changed.
Wednesday was a very difficult day for me, but then Thursday was a good day once I got out of the house. We had a MOPS steering team play date and lunch...so nice! It was really encouraging, plus the kids had a great time seeing friends while splashing in the pool and getting sandy in the sandbox. After that, I picked up the kids' cousins for a play date. My mom came over as well, and watched the kids in the evening so DH and I could go out ALONE to dinner and to Barnes and Noble. So nice! Thanks, mom! I didn't have to remind Mark to sit up in the booth or to use his inside voice. ;) It's nice to have some time to date my husband.
Nathan also had big news on Thursday! He cut his first tooth! He actually did quite well, other than waking frequently Wednesday night wanting to nurse.
Friday I had a revelation that I need to establish more consistent routines for myself even on the days I'm not going anywhere. I've had some days where I just feel blah, and I don't bother getting dressed until late in the day. Seriously, my shower is about as good as my Zoloft. It's amazing what it does for me. There's nothing wrong with a PJ day now and then, but with my recent tendencies to get overwhelmed and down with the PPD, I need to take care of myself. Most of the time, Nathan is happy during the shower. If not, well, 15 minutes of fussing never hurt a healthy baby! I see so many moms say they just don't have time for a shower. Um, it's what a Pack N Play is made for once the baby is mobile. Oh, next week I purposely scheduled swimming lessons early for the kids, so it gets me ready and out of the house first thing.
Wednesday was a very difficult day for me, but then Thursday was a good day once I got out of the house. We had a MOPS steering team play date and lunch...so nice! It was really encouraging, plus the kids had a great time seeing friends while splashing in the pool and getting sandy in the sandbox. After that, I picked up the kids' cousins for a play date. My mom came over as well, and watched the kids in the evening so DH and I could go out ALONE to dinner and to Barnes and Noble. So nice! Thanks, mom! I didn't have to remind Mark to sit up in the booth or to use his inside voice. ;) It's nice to have some time to date my husband.
Nathan also had big news on Thursday! He cut his first tooth! He actually did quite well, other than waking frequently Wednesday night wanting to nurse.
Friday I had a revelation that I need to establish more consistent routines for myself even on the days I'm not going anywhere. I've had some days where I just feel blah, and I don't bother getting dressed until late in the day. Seriously, my shower is about as good as my Zoloft. It's amazing what it does for me. There's nothing wrong with a PJ day now and then, but with my recent tendencies to get overwhelmed and down with the PPD, I need to take care of myself. Most of the time, Nathan is happy during the shower. If not, well, 15 minutes of fussing never hurt a healthy baby! I see so many moms say they just don't have time for a shower. Um, it's what a Pack N Play is made for once the baby is mobile. Oh, next week I purposely scheduled swimming lessons early for the kids, so it gets me ready and out of the house first thing.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Fighting Some PPD...
First of all, I'm woefully behind in blogging here. I'll leave the good news about Ellie for another post since I think most everyone is on FB already. In short, we're just watching the malformations and no surgery at this time.
Since I'm all too familiar with PPD, I'm pretty aware that I've been battling it recently. I want to be open and help others, but also be careful how I bare my heart on a public blog. I've been fighting some anxiety and insomnia. I tend to get really down on myself and easily frustrated and overwhelmed. Sometimes it's kind of like being in a fog. I have trouble making decisions even as simple as what to eat, or remembering things I should remember. Yesterday at our church picnic, one of my friends asked who had Nathan, and I couldn't remember the lady's name who was holding him! Of course, I knew who was holding him...her name just escaped me.
I'm not sure what I'll do at this point. I'm still seeing a wonderful therapist I met when I had PPD after Ellie. She was one of the study coordinators, and has been a big help to me. There are risks and benefits to medication changes, especially since I'm still nursing Nathan.
I'm grateful for my DH. He tries so hard to make things easier for me. Our carpets needed a good cleaning, more than what the carpet cleaner we own does. So he rented a machine, and spent hours cleaning the carpets for me. Sure, he likes them clean, but I know the real reason he did it for me.
Since I'm all too familiar with PPD, I'm pretty aware that I've been battling it recently. I want to be open and help others, but also be careful how I bare my heart on a public blog. I've been fighting some anxiety and insomnia. I tend to get really down on myself and easily frustrated and overwhelmed. Sometimes it's kind of like being in a fog. I have trouble making decisions even as simple as what to eat, or remembering things I should remember. Yesterday at our church picnic, one of my friends asked who had Nathan, and I couldn't remember the lady's name who was holding him! Of course, I knew who was holding him...her name just escaped me.
I'm not sure what I'll do at this point. I'm still seeing a wonderful therapist I met when I had PPD after Ellie. She was one of the study coordinators, and has been a big help to me. There are risks and benefits to medication changes, especially since I'm still nursing Nathan.
I'm grateful for my DH. He tries so hard to make things easier for me. Our carpets needed a good cleaning, more than what the carpet cleaner we own does. So he rented a machine, and spent hours cleaning the carpets for me. Sure, he likes them clean, but I know the real reason he did it for me.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
I'm concerned...
Ellie's appointment is this afternoon, and I'm sitting here getting a little teary. I probably shouldn't surf the 'net for more information, and honestly, I haven't recently. But from what the dermatologist has told us, surgery may not take care of it. Apparently, surgery on a venous malformation is pretty complicated, and the malformation can come back in spite of surgery.
Most of the time, I feel like I'm doing okay with it all. I do truly believe that God is looking out for Ellie, and that He loves her even more than I do. What an amazing thing, huh?
I can tell Ellie's a bit worried about it herself. She gets pretty quiet on the way to her "big" appointments. If you know Ellie well, that's not normal...lol. Mark and I try to not worry her too much with our concerns about it all.
Most of the time, I feel like I'm doing okay with it all. I do truly believe that God is looking out for Ellie, and that He loves her even more than I do. What an amazing thing, huh?
I can tell Ellie's a bit worried about it herself. She gets pretty quiet on the way to her "big" appointments. If you know Ellie well, that's not normal...lol. Mark and I try to not worry her too much with our concerns about it all.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Ellie's Appointment
Tomorrow afternoon is the big appointment with the pediatric vascular surgeon. We'll find out what he recommends about her venous malformations. I'm expecting that they will recommend surgery, since the first one has grown so much and gotten harder, and on Sunday she woke with a new one higher on her arm.
We spent most of the day Sunday in the Emergency Department after discovering she'd developed a second malformation overnight. The staff was great, and we actually had a private room in the ER with a door into a children's waiting room. That waiting room was locked, and you could only be admitted with staff approval. So it was nice to know she wouldn't catch H1N1 or something when she hung out there.
Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers!
We spent most of the day Sunday in the Emergency Department after discovering she'd developed a second malformation overnight. The staff was great, and we actually had a private room in the ER with a door into a children's waiting room. That waiting room was locked, and you could only be admitted with staff approval. So it was nice to know she wouldn't catch H1N1 or something when she hung out there.
Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers!
First Solids
Nathan finally had his first solid food tonight. He had rice cereal with a little formula, and then I added in some bananas too. He really likes sitting up like a big boy in the high chair! I intended to start solids a little bit sooner, but we've been quite busy the last few weeks. The high chair needed a good scrubbing, but really looks good yet for an eight year old high chair. Anyway, he liked it, I think, but wasn't quite sure what to do with his tongue. I have a video to post soon.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Ellie's MRA/MRV
I admit to typing out the post below because it was distracting. I love my kitties fiercely, yet it can't even compare to how I feel about my three human children. I've been trying to pray, trust God, and not worry too much. But my beautiful daughter is having an MRA and MRV tomorrow. She's had a venous malformation on her left arm for about three years. A year ago, they did an ultrasound, and we needed to keep an eye on it. Her arm then measured 7.5 inches.
A few weeks ago, I noticed it had grown significantly. I was able to talk to the nurse, who fortunately had the doctor walk by while she was on the phone. The doctor told her to work us in that next week. Sure enough, it was 9 inches and much harder than the last time. Dr. T is not sure what the reason, possibly a blood clot. She ordered the specialized MRI to be done in the next few weeks. I think my therapist mind sometimes knows too much, because it's hard not to think of what "could" happen. I know that worry won't do any good, and it won't help the situation.
Tomorrow we go in, and she will be sedated. Grandpa John has kindly offered to come watch the boys for us, and Mark took the day off of work. Your prayers are appreciated! We see Dr. T on Friday, and should get results.
A few weeks ago, I noticed it had grown significantly. I was able to talk to the nurse, who fortunately had the doctor walk by while she was on the phone. The doctor told her to work us in that next week. Sure enough, it was 9 inches and much harder than the last time. Dr. T is not sure what the reason, possibly a blood clot. She ordered the specialized MRI to be done in the next few weeks. I think my therapist mind sometimes knows too much, because it's hard not to think of what "could" happen. I know that worry won't do any good, and it won't help the situation.
Tomorrow we go in, and she will be sedated. Grandpa John has kindly offered to come watch the boys for us, and Mark took the day off of work. Your prayers are appreciated! We see Dr. T on Friday, and should get results.
Goodbye Fluff Bucket
Somehow I couldn't bring myself to post here after I lost my kitty in early May. I think partly because it was hard to re-live that day, and partly because somehow posting here would make it more real. Time does heal, but it still hurts to think of that day.
We adopted Fluffy, aka the Bucket, the summer we got married. She was this itty bitty flea infested, starving kitten, but oh, so soft and cute! We still laugh about how she tried to eat the whole bowl of cat food, and I have pics of her hanging out in Mark's shoe. We bathed her, and then Mark wrapped her up in the electric blanket (yeah, we had one in those days...lol). Fluffy had quite the reputation, and most of our family and friends were truly scared of her. She was our guard "dog", and would sit and just watch people. She would hiss and attempt to bite most people who tried to get friendly with her. I often would lock her away from company. It was hard for some to believe that she was usually loving and a cuddly with us.
When I have more time, I'll post some of the funny stories about her. Fortunately, she didn't suffer long in the end. The vet is pretty sure she had a large mass on her brain. She was loved and cuddled and safe with us in the end. And she was obviously very ill. The vet at the hospital where we'd taken her for further evaluation wrote us a very sweet card and said what a sweet kitty she was! I laughed a little and showed Mark when I read that. Fluffy sweet at the vet? Normally she took Zanax before her trips to the vet. Nope, I'm not kidding. Her vet wrote the Rx. LOL. We got a lovely, hand painted clay paw print memento afterward as well, and then the tears fell again. I will eventually take some pictures to share.
We adopted Fluffy, aka the Bucket, the summer we got married. She was this itty bitty flea infested, starving kitten, but oh, so soft and cute! We still laugh about how she tried to eat the whole bowl of cat food, and I have pics of her hanging out in Mark's shoe. We bathed her, and then Mark wrapped her up in the electric blanket (yeah, we had one in those days...lol). Fluffy had quite the reputation, and most of our family and friends were truly scared of her. She was our guard "dog", and would sit and just watch people. She would hiss and attempt to bite most people who tried to get friendly with her. I often would lock her away from company. It was hard for some to believe that she was usually loving and a cuddly with us.
When I have more time, I'll post some of the funny stories about her. Fortunately, she didn't suffer long in the end. The vet is pretty sure she had a large mass on her brain. She was loved and cuddled and safe with us in the end. And she was obviously very ill. The vet at the hospital where we'd taken her for further evaluation wrote us a very sweet card and said what a sweet kitty she was! I laughed a little and showed Mark when I read that. Fluffy sweet at the vet? Normally she took Zanax before her trips to the vet. Nope, I'm not kidding. Her vet wrote the Rx. LOL. We got a lovely, hand painted clay paw print memento afterward as well, and then the tears fell again. I will eventually take some pictures to share.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Simplifying my Life
I'm so ready to simplify my life, 15 minutes at a time! During the past year, I haven't been able to keep up with my home as much as I'd like to. If you were to walk into my home, the first views aren't too bad. I try hard to keep our first floor reasonably picked up, and I'm pretty picky about clutter in the kitchen especially.
Some of the other areas need more work, especially the infamous laundry pile! I'm trying to decide how many clothes we really need. Flylady says if you're struggling, you probably own too many clothes. Of course, the situation is not helped by having a bed wetting child (who I won't name here). Both DH and I are tired of the nearly daily load of laundry from that. Right now, our master bedroom is not a haven, and I want to change that.
Books are another item I own too many of, but I am happy to say that I've recently added a ton of them to our church library to share with others! DH was only too happy to lug in those heavy boxes for me...seriously! Ah, freedom!
Baby steps will get me there.
Some of the other areas need more work, especially the infamous laundry pile! I'm trying to decide how many clothes we really need. Flylady says if you're struggling, you probably own too many clothes. Of course, the situation is not helped by having a bed wetting child (who I won't name here). Both DH and I are tired of the nearly daily load of laundry from that. Right now, our master bedroom is not a haven, and I want to change that.
Books are another item I own too many of, but I am happy to say that I've recently added a ton of them to our church library to share with others! DH was only too happy to lug in those heavy boxes for me...seriously! Ah, freedom!
Baby steps will get me there.
What Really Matters?
The sermon this morning spoke to my heart. Pastor C, our intern pastor until our lead pastor starts next week, spoke on the last chapter of 1 Timothy. Our culture is so focused on having it all and getting ahead. No, there's nothing wrong with having money or working hard to get money. However, when my life here is done, I can't take it with me. It really makes me think about how I manage my money and what type of value I place on it. The things I own will not last forever either. Pastor C reminded us of Jim Elliot's quote, "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose."
Friday, April 24, 2009
He Did It!!!
Nathan slept though the night for the first time! He was unusually fussy last night, and I asked Mark to go get him some teething tablets. I looked in his mouth, and there were little indentations where the first teeth will be. He was drooling and chewing on his hands like crazy. Three teething tablets later (yes, that's the dose!), he calmed down and was out like a light! He slept from about 9 pm to 6:30 am.
Now if only Ellie would have slept through. She normally always does, but she was up around 1 or so. Then I woke to check on Nathan around 3:30 am.
I wonder if we'll get a sleep repeat tonight!
Now if only Ellie would have slept through. She normally always does, but she was up around 1 or so. Then I woke to check on Nathan around 3:30 am.
I wonder if we'll get a sleep repeat tonight!
Two Little Lines Changed my Life!
Yes, it's been nearly a year since I updated this blog! It was just over a year ago I got two little lines on a pregnancy test. The pregnancy was so rough I'm not surprised that I never updated here...hyperemesis, bed rest, and pre-eclampsia. The end result was so worth it! We welcomed our sweet bundle of joy, Nathan Mark, into the world on December 17, 2008, at 5:04 am. (Yes, he was born at the exact same time of day as his big sister!) He weighed 7 lbs. 14 oz., and was 18" long. We had a nurse remeasure him when he was a few days old, and he was 18.5". My sister says the first measurement wasn't accurate.
We are so blessed to have him here, and Ellie and Andrew really enjoy him. Ellie especially has become a little mommy, soothing him, assisting diaper changes, etc.
I'll update more on the past year here and there as I have time. :)
I'm feeling like I tend to spend too much time on the 'net, so maybe it's silly to start up blogging again. But I think it's a good, quick way to keep people updated, you know? I don't plan to completely disappear, but I need to spend more time with my kids and taking care of my house. It seems with three children that my home very quickly goes downhill if I don't take time to take care of it frequently.
We are so blessed to have him here, and Ellie and Andrew really enjoy him. Ellie especially has become a little mommy, soothing him, assisting diaper changes, etc.
I'll update more on the past year here and there as I have time. :)
I'm feeling like I tend to spend too much time on the 'net, so maybe it's silly to start up blogging again. But I think it's a good, quick way to keep people updated, you know? I don't plan to completely disappear, but I need to spend more time with my kids and taking care of my house. It seems with three children that my home very quickly goes downhill if I don't take time to take care of it frequently.
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